The Right to be a “Lady” to which I identify

We’ve come a long way in women’s rights. I’m not a feminist but do agree we should be treated equally as far as being a human being is concerned. We’re still way behind in how we’re treated in the medical community and often fighting to be heard and taken seriously. This is still a huge deficit that needs fixing. So now that we’re making some progress, I was essentially told in a Facebook group that tagging ladies to a post is offensive. Wait what?

I know we have a lot of issues in our world with discrimination and acceptance. We have all kinds of groups standing up and demanding equal respect. I’m all for respect of persons. But what I don’t understand and I don’t think is right, is to tell a lady that she can’t make a post looking for the experiences of other ladies. This might be offensive to those who are transgender or other forms of genders that are carving outa  place in this world.

I’ll admit, I’m extremely confused on all the new labels being put out there but how in the world is calling yourself a lady and asking for the opinions of other ladies, offensive? Why should I have to change my wording to satisfy a group different from my own? I’d never ask another what their gender is to begin with nor would I bash another for adding their own experience to a post. So why should I have to change who I am to satisfy those who seek to be accepted? Wouldn’t that be discriminatory towards me or others like me? I just don’t understand how that makes sense. If you consider yourself a lady, then by all means, share your experience, I certainly won’t be calling you out and asking about your lady bits or lack there of.

I just see so many double standards playing out in our world today. I identify as a lady. I have lady bits. It’s who I am and how I feel. So why would that be offensive? If you are a trans person and changing your gender to be a lady, how is this excluding you? If your changing your gender to be a man, again, how would me identifying as a lady be offensive? If you don’t identify with either one, again, how is me, identifying as a lady be exclusionary to you when we all have our own niches to fit into.

There’s enough hate in our world without adding more hate to it. I understand that trans feel excluded. They feel misunderstood and are fighting for their own rights. I’m not going to debate my viewpoint on that as it’s my own view that I have a right to and your business is not my business. But how would forcing me to change my own understanding of myself and choosing different words for my own identity to make another feel better, be ok, or right? If trans are calling out others for ‘forcing’ them into an identity, then isn’t it the same to force others to identify differently for the sake of making another feel better about themselves? It’s truly confusing and frustrating.

I know I’m not alone in feeling the way I do. I’m not making judgements on another person’s identity. Please don’t judge me for sticking with the identity that feels right to me.  I’m happy to be a lady and happy to continue to fight to be heard as a lady and taken seriously as a lady in the world in which we navigate. You do you. Just let me do me.

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